Shutdown Check-In: Week 5

It’s been over a month since the U.S. government shut down, and I’m one of over a million federal employees not getting paid.

It's guaranteed that life will keep throwing us curveballs — whether it’s suddenly losing a job or having your car break down (which happened to me last week too!)

Although not ideal, these events remind us to focus on what we can control instead of what we can’t.

The last month hasn’t been easy. I’ve felt lost, unproductive, and unbalanced at times. But I’ve learned to pause, observe my emotions, and ask:

• What do I want to do with this unexpected gift of time?

• How can I use it to feel more fulfilled?

That reflection in conjunction with my mindfulness tools have helped me find clarity and a new rhythm in the short term.

This week, I started working with my husband at Open Corner Architecture, and it feels amazing to be back in my morning routine and at my own desk again. I already feel more energetic and purposeful.

At ming+ming, we remind you that the answers you're seeking are within you! You just need the skills, tools, and space to listen to the wisdom within and the courage to follow through.

If you're feeling lost, unproductive, or unbalanced, you're not alone. We've all been there. Know that we can help you find clarity, guidance, or a new rhythm in your life. Just comment below to get started.

With love,
Ming-Wai

You are stronger than you know.

You are stronger than you know.

Life is hard sometimes.

Things don't always go the way we want it to. And that can feel like a defeat. It may feel like betrayal. You may feel resentment, anger, sadness, loneliness.

These are totally valid feelings. Very uncomfortable. No wonder we want to avoid them.

Here is an invitation to take a moment to sit with these uncomfortable feelings. 

Take a moment to recall a time in your past where you felt defeated, betrayed, angry or sad.

In retrospect, it was a blessing in disguise. It was likely a time of personal growth, a shift in perspective, or an opportunity to leave a toxic environment.

Simply put, it initiated a sudden change in your life and you responded to that change.

Sure, it was probably scary, uncertain, unexpected... and in the short term, felt like a defeat. But it wasn't.

You are stronger now. You learned from it. It shaped the person you are today.

This discomfort that we are feeling right now is not a defeat. Trust that it is here to help guide you to do the inner work that will put you on the path to success.

We got you. You got you.

Do you have chronic decision fatigue?

Has this ever happened to you?

You get into work, log into your email, scheduling meetings, make thoughtful decisions about your projects, answer questions, schedule follow-up meetings...

Go to lunch, respond to emails from your kids school, respond to long-winded texts from your parents, schedule a doctor's appointment, then back to work to more meetings and emails...

And when you come home, someone has the nerve to ask "What's for dinner?"

You feel like yelling at them and saying "WTF??? You pick! Why do I always have to decide?" because it's exhausting to make yet another decision at the end of a long day?

Yeah... that's happened to us way more times than we want to admit.

If you're feeling short-tempered at the end of the day and annoyed at simple questions, you're likely suffering from decision fatigue. 

You're irritable with your loved ones. You're not eating healthy. You're scrolling social media before bed.

That doesn't make you feel good about yourself, but it's also really hard to change these habits because people rely on you to get shit done and you're pretty awesome at it!

What if we told you that it's possible to feel more in control and fulfilled in your life without decision fatigue. Here are some tools to shift your perspective...

The book Slow Productivity by Cal Newport not only gave me tips on how to say yes to things that light me up and no to things that drained me, it also gave me deeper understanding about why I kept slipping back into burnout mode.

This documentary came out in 2016 and 9 years later, it couldn't be more relevant.

This film highlights that we have been conditioned to chase the "American Dream" by wanting and needing more stuff to make us happy. But it's having the opposite effect.

Personally, I don't really want to live in a tiny house or live out of a suitcase but I have felt the freedom of letting go of stuff and intentionally not renting a storage unit.

From a decision fatigue perspective... less stuff = less decisions. 

If you want to feel more balanced and fulfilled over a long weekend... ming+ming retreat is what you need.

It's a mental, physical, and emotional reset so you feel rejuvinated.

Chef-prepared meals, restorative yoga, lounging by the pool, guidance from your spirit guides, and sitting in the hot tub gazing at the stars.

Minimal decision-making. Massive clarity-receiving.

Only a few rooms left! Book a private room or a bed in the communal room.

*Scholarships available (especially for current and former federal employees)

ming + ming retreat this october

you're invited to this transformative retreat...
yoga. meditation. reiki. sound bath. crystals. art. akashic records. coaching.
5 days. All-inclusive. Healing on all dimensions.
A few private rooms + communal room spots left!

*ming+ming members get 20% off
**Scholarships available (especially for current and former federal employees)
Reply to this email to get the coupon code.

Am I addicted to the news?

Hi. I'm Ming-Wai and I'm addicted to the news.

The news was making me feel overwhelmed, out of control, and anxious.

So I quit.

I was a journalism major in undergrad and loved long-form journalism, community newspapers, the Sunday New York Times, and NPR driveway moments.

Although I never became a journalist by profession, I appreciated the art of it and believed that the press was the "4th branch of government" holding the executive, legislative, and judicial branches accountable to the public.

But over the last 25 years, the news has changed as technology has changed.

And instead of feeling informed and empowered by the news, I was feeling overwhelmed and anxious by it.

I quit the news about 1.5 years ago. I cancelled my subscriptions and turned off the radio when driving.

I was worried I'd be missing out, but I haven't really missed it. (And the news that matters to me always gets to me somehow... through conversation or a gifted article in my inbox.)

The best part is that I feel less overwhelmed, more in control, and more grounded.

Just like this Psychology Today article suggests, I now consume media in doses that doesn't overwhelm me.

Let me know if you've quit the news too (or are thinking of it). Comment below!

With love,

Ming-Wai

I need a vacation from my vacation

Do you ever feel like you need a vacation from your vacation?

It makes sense... who wants to come back to work? Who wants to return to the to-do lists, the expectations, the meal planning?

The daily grind is exhausting.  But what if it didn't have to be?

ming+ming was created so we could truly enjoy the life we work so hard to create.

We want to enjoy life every day. Not just when we're on vacation.

So for the rest of the summer, we're sharing our favorite tools with you: books, podcasts, products, services, and more.

About 8 years ago, we started sharing tools with each other and it was the beginning of ming+ming.

You gotta start somewhere. Let's start having more fun and less grind in our daily lives.

We got you. You got you.

Ming-Wai + Ming-Cee

P.S. If you have books, podcasts, products, services or anything else that shifted your perspective and/or changed your life for the better, please share them in the comments! We'd love to try it out too!

Spring Rejuvenation

It's so easy to get sucked into the hustle and bustle of the modern world.

I struggle with this everyday.

But today, I took the morning off and enjoyed tending my little garden.

Feeling the warm sun on my body and hearing the birds sing invited me to pay attention to the miracle of spring. 

It invited me to see and appreciate the things I walk by without notice every day after a long day at work.

I invite you to take a few minutes today to marvel in the miracle of spring. Absorb it into your body. Let it infuse into your energy field. You won't regret it.

Here are a few photos of my walk around the yard today.

With love,
Ming-Wai

How to interpret YOUR signs (part 2)

Last month, we focused on how to interpret external signs you were receiving (like the wild turkey that flew in front of my windshield). Click HERE to read about that.

This month, we’ll focus on how to interpret internal signs. These are the subtle signs that we feel in our bodies and our intuition. I call this "body wisdom."

Here's a hard truth about body wisdom... most of us dismiss these valuable internal signs. And it's not our fault.

We've been conditioned to take a pill to solve our problems.

We are told that our chronic discomfort is "all in our mind."

We push through the pain because getting stuff done is valued more than healing our bodies.

So if you're feeling called to develop the skill of listening and responding to your body wisdom, here are a few tools to integrate into your routine...

keep reading...

Please leave a comment with the mindfulness tools that work for you.
We'd love to know!

What's your sign?

I have a friend that always finds four-leaf clovers.

Especially if she was going through a hard time, she'd take a walk and spot a four-leaf clover in the grass and we would smile and say her spirit guides were supporting her.

It didn't happen once, or twice, but all the time (and still does). It's kinda amazing.

This was about seven years ago, and I was going through a difficult time and desperately wanted a sign that everything would be ok.

I would take a lunchtime walk on the National Mall almost everyday. And on this day, I decided to search the grass for a four-leaf clover.

I scanned through clumps of grass all up and down the mall. I sat and squatted to focus on different patches of clover. I walked around and tried to "sense" where my lucky clover would be.

After about an hour, I was annoyed that I hadn't found anything. I felt defeated. So I sat down and gave up my search.

My eyes stopped looking and I realized that in the middle of the clover patch right next to me, there was a perfect imprint of a horseshoe. It was like it just appeared once I unfocused my eyes and stopped looking.

What I realized in that moment was that I was looking for someone else's sign.

I had wanted so desperately for my sign to be a four-leaf clover that I had overlooked MY sign of a lucky horseshoe. I lost faith that MY sign would come in its own time, in its own form.

This was a turning point in my relationship with my intuition and my personal journey.

I couldn't compare my healing journey, my spiritual journey, my life journey with anyone else.

The answers I am seeking are within me. I needed to invest in a healthier relationship with myself to build that trust in myself.

I learned not to look for something specific, but to be open to receiving what comes.

I trust that what's meant for me will come to me in its own way.

I practice being open to receiving what comes instead of looking for something specific.

And since then, my signs come in the form of birds (especially cardinals and hawks), the number 4, and other patterns and synchronicities.

With love,

Ming-Wai

Thrive in Chaos

How the federal layoffs are affecting me

Last week was a rough week for me.

Many of you know that I am a proud civil servant and work for the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA).

Thanks to all of you that reached out to check on me with this first round of layoffs. I'm doing okay and appreciate your love and support.

Last Thursday afternoon, 6 members of my federal team were terminated and given an hour to pack up and leave. On Saturday, I was informed that 8-10 of my contractors will also be terminated soon.

Honestly, I doubt I'll have a job by the end of the year.

My life is chaotic to say the least. This is only one aspect of many changes that I'm juggling right now.

I have times where I feel anger, sadness, injustice, confusion, frustration, fear... but also moments of clarity and peace.

It's in these moments of clarity that I feel focused and empowered to step into the unknown. When I get excited and curious knowing that I'm being given an opportunity for growth and change.

And THAT is what thriving in chaos means to me.

I am not a pawn in this game of life. I am in control of what I choose to put my energy into. I am here to create this next chapter in my life with purpose and intention.

Join me and Ming-Cee on Sunday, March 30th, to walk through the steps to THRIVE in the inevitable chaos that life will throw at you.

Early bird pricing - Only $99 until 3/23/25. (free for ming+ming members)

50% off for federal employees and contractors. Also, scholarships available.

With love,
Ming-Wai

Change is hard… and then you grow

My grandfather (aka Gung Gung) died in 1996 when I was 15 and it was one of the most impactful moments in my life. He was the center of our family. He was our stability. He was unconditional love. And suddenly, he was gone.

For years, I remember thinking “life would be so much easier if he was still here.” It felt unfair. I felt betrayed. I felt heartbroken. I felt lost.

I didn’t know myself then. I only knew who I was in relation to him.

It’s been almost 30 years, and I occasionally find myself still tearing up and missing my Gung Gung. But in retrospect, I recognize the gift of self-discovery his death gave me.

The road was hard and scary.

I fell, I picked myself up.

I got lost, I found my way back.

I am here today stronger, wiser, more compassionate, and more confident on this wild adventure.

I am reflecting on this transitional time in my life because it feels very similar to what I’m feeling right now about America.

I am grieving. I am processing.

America is my home. My ideology. My career. My identity. My stability.

And since January 20, 2025, I feel like the America I know and love is gone and the American ideals that I embodied have forever changed.

It feels unfair. I feel betrayed. I feel heartbroken.

I feel like life would be so much easier if things hadn't changed. But they have and here we are.

The road ahead looks hard and scary from where I stand but I’ve done this before... and I can do it again.

This time around, I don’t feel as lost.

I have my tools. I have my community. I know who I am. I know my value.

I know what is right. I know what is wrong.

I am guided by my personal values, my intuition, and my purpose in life.

I believe that we heal America by healing ourselves first.

Instead of blaming others for our discomfort, ming+ming invites us inward to really know and love ourselves. The 11 step method, the tools, the classes, the 1-on-1 sessions, and the community are all in service to knowing and believing in our own unique path.

And since we can't control the chaos all around us, it's an invitation to start with ourselves first. With ming+ming, all you have to do is show up and in time, you will feel more confident navigating the craziness in your life.

I believe this with my whole being.

I'm dedicated to keep moving forward helping anyone that wants to live a life of more confidence and ease.  And I know my Gung Gung is smiling and cheering me on from Heaven.

With love,

Ming-Wai

The Practice of Surrender

Happy New Year!

Our New Year's resolution is to build the ming+ming platform to help you achieve your goals this year.

The theme of surrender has come up a lot in our ming+ming classes recently and it's been a beautiful perspective shift for us.

When we hear the word "surrender," most of us think we need to give up something or we lose something.

Surrendering is the last thing we want to do when we're stressed. It makes us feel like we're losing control.

So instead, we get organized, check our boxes faster, wake up earlier, and multi-task because we're high-achievers, we're doers, and it would take too much time to ask for help. 

But that's exactly what we need to do... ask for and be open to receiving help. 

It feels uncomfortable to surrender and receive help because we're natural givers! It makes us feel good to help others but hard to receive.

But it is necessary to balance the masculine energy of pushing forward and the feminine energy of receiving. 

Sometimes surrendering is prioritizing a yoga class when you'd rather skip it get things done.

Sometimes surrendering is asking a neighbor, family member, or friend to watch the kids so you can take a bath in peace.

Sometimes surrendering is meditating and asking your spirit guides to give you guidance and help you get through a sticky situation.

So if you feel like you're giving a lot this holiday season, we invite you to surrender and receive the love and help that is all around you. 

We got you. You got you.

Ming-Wai + Ming-Cee

Our fav crystals to survive the holidays

This weekend, we were all excited for the holidays!

And then the anxiety of getting everything done in the next 24 days sunk in!!

If you're feeling like there's a million things on your to-do list and everyone is relying on you, your instinct is probably to push harder! But instead, we invite you to pause, breathe, and get grounded first. 

Here are 3 of our favorite grounding crystals to work with over the holidays.

Leveraging crystal energies are only one of the many tools at ming+ming to get you moving in the direction that you really want to go. 

If you're feeling stressed this holiday season, let us know! We'll help you pick the right crystal for you to work with.

CLICK HERE to see Ming-Wai's favorite crystal book and online crystal store.

We got you. You got you.
Ming-Wai + Ming-Cee

PS. We have a few spots left at the ming + ming retreat in an Luis Obispo, CA - January 16-20, 2025.

get the coupon code

If you're ready for transformational healing on all dimensions, this is for you.

Join ming+ming for 5 days of self-discovery and healing on all dimensions…

yoga
meditation
reiki
sound bath
crystal energy
art healing
energy balancing
akashic records
personal coaching
amazing gifts
and more...

See the daily schedule and updated retreat website: 

retreat details

You're invited to the ming+ming retreat

We know you're busy.
We know you have a ton of responsibilities.
We know you don't have enough time.

Here’s your solution - take a long weekend just for YOU in January 2025!

Let us take care of you... so you can be the best version of yourself and feel confident moving forward when you get back home. 

We'll see you in San Luis Obispo on January 16-20, 2025.

Experience complete nourishment of your mind, body and spirit for 5 blissful days on California’s central coast. 

No cooking or cleaning. Take a break from your never ending to-do list. Step away from the roles and responsibilities you manage for everyone else.

Enjoy fresh, healthy chef-prepared meals. We’ll even have nourishing snacks in between!

Enjoy daily guided movement and meditation classes that are designed to meet you where you’re at, not where others expect you to be. (Beginners are highly encouraged to attend!)

Invest in the freedom of down time to do exactly what YOU want to do without judgment like taking a nap, reading a book, soaking in the hot tub, going on a hike, or star gazing right before a restful night’s sleep.

And finally, you’ll learn the ming+ming 11-step method that will help you learn to connect with yourself on a deeper level. You will discover your own creative solutions and move forward with more ease and confidence in your decisions, no matter how busy life gets.

We guarantee that you will leave feeling refreshed and rejuvenated, but more importantly, you’ll leave feeling confident you have the right foundation that will lead to incredible transformations.

We got you. You got you.

Ming-Wai + Ming-Cee

PS…
Thinking of gifts for the Holiday Season? Help support a small business in Asheville!

When Ming-Cee was in Asheville a couple months ago, she literally wanted to get one of everything at Mangum Pottery. Our friends, Beth and Rob Mangum, are incredible potters and it’s our favorite shop in town.

Buy early holiday presents and help the Mangums get through this slow time as we rebuild the Asheville area.

Ming-Cee’s favorite - The Divine Feminine Mug

Do you love Ming-Cee’s mug? It’s not on their website because it was made by their daughter. Their daughter’s entire studio flooded but she’s safe. If you’re interested in buying one, reach out to me and I’ll ask them if she has any more.

Processing the Aftermath of Hurricane Helene

I left Asheville last Wednesday to attend the Mindful Leader Summit in DC. I knew the storm was forecasted but I didn't think it was going to be more than a windy and rainy couple of days. That's what hurricanes typically feel like when they get to us because we're inland and in the mountains.

Friday morning, I got a message from my husband reporting some trees were down, the house was fine, but the power was out so I should call the landline. Pretty typical.

So I call the landline. And it just rings.

A few hours later, I try again. Nothing.

Friday afternoon, I try again. The line is dead. It's not even ringing.

And this is when I start getting super anxious and worrying about the worst case scenarios.

For 24 hours, I'm worrying internally while trying to act normal at my conference. There's still no way to get in touch with my family.

It's so ironic that I'm at a mindfulness conference too! There is yoga and meditation in the morning. We have movement breaks between sessions. We start sessions with moments of silence.

But these "good-for-you" mindfulness exercises were actually heightening my anxiety.

Saturday afternoon, I finally get in touch with my husband. Our family is safe. We have a generator. We have water. Still no power, no phone, no cell service... and no clue when it will restored. Our community looks like a war zone.

I'm sharing this with you because I was reminded that mindfulness, meditation, yoga, and all these tools don't magically take away our anxiety, grief, and discomfort. Sometimes, they actually heighten our emotions.

What I am grateful for is that my mindfulness tools gave me a choice. A choice to feel in control vs. freaking out.

During the 24 hours where I couldn't get in touch with anyone, I desperately scrolled social media searching for news and pictures of my community. But I chose to turn it off when I realized scrolling wasn't going to give me the answers I was seeking. Instead, I chose to do breathing exercises so that I could fall asleep.

I still felt uncomfortable, but the discomfort wasn't controlling me. I felt in control of my well-being even though I was worrying about my family and friends.

To be honest, I'm processing what I'll be coming home to and I'm worried. And that's normal and okay to feel so I'm not trying to "fix" anything. I just give myself permission to feel it.

Thank you to everyone who has called, texted, messaged to check in and make sure we're okay. It's meant a lot to see and feel your love.

In deep gratitude,
Ming-Wai

The center of our little town is flooded and washed out.

This is the bottom of our road. The river of water you see is usually a creek. 

What strikes me about this photo is that it's so beautiful. So much damage and destruction... but when the sun comes out, there is hope and inspiration.

Don’t be a faker...

Let’s face it, we’ve been conditioned to perform since we were little (aka fake it).  

We were told to behave well, dress the part, and color inside the lines. That way we’d be accepted by our family, friends and community.  And for the most part, we nailed it!

We’re really successful in most aspects of our lives because we’ve been trained to do things the “right” way and meet others' expectations. We have worked hard to get where we are today - doing hard work isn’t our problem.  

So what is the problem?

The problem is, despite our high achievements and recognition for jobs well done, we can’t shake the deeper knowing that there’s a disconnect between our successful image and how we actually feel on the inside.

When something is missing, like a certain quality in a relationship or a deep questioning of whether all our hard work has been worth the sacrifice, we become overwhelmed with confusion because we’ve spent most of our lives performing to a script.

So how can the performance that's provided so much of our success, be the same thing that’s keeping us stuck?

It’s because the performance is based on how others measure our worth.

However, when we do this a million times over, it becomes a subconscious pattern. Without even knowing it, we become detached from ourselves. We don’t even know what we want anymore. We only know how to be “good enough” in the eyes of others.

Over time as we continue the performance our identity gets lost and we develop a mistrust in our own decisions without understanding why. We begin to believe that looking good on the outside will be at the expense of feeling like shit on the inside.

We understand because we felt that way too. But not anymore.

Now we know that we can look good on the outside and feel grounded, vibrant, and confident on the inside too!

That’s why we created the ming+ming method that took us from overwhelming confusion to deeper understanding and clarity. 

The ming+ming 11 step process guides you back home to yourself so you can start discovering your own answers to stop performing and start living authentically.

So if you’re exhausted from performing, click the “heart” and leave a comment below. We’ll tell you how to unlearn the performance script and get you back in control of your life.

We got you. You got you.

Ming-Wai + Ming-Cee

Parenting doesn't come with instructions

You can't get a degree in parenting before having kids. And even if you could, it wouldn't make you the perfect parent. 

Parenting is challenging to say the least, and for the most part, each generation is just trying to do their best for the next.

So despite all the books, the warnings, and the lectures on parenting best practices... nothing could actually prepare us for what we were about to experience.

We assume our parents feel similarly. And their parents before them. We're all just doing the best we can!

But many of us are still healing from inconsistent, controlling, or emotionally unavailable parents.

Many of us are struggling to manage difficult emotions like anger, shame, and people-pleasing tendencies that we learned in childhood.

You weren't born with instructions and so it's time you learn the skills to re-parent yourself!

 SIGN UP NOW

 Our friend and mindful reparenting expert, Bonnie, will guide this interactive 3-hour workshop.

This Mindful Reparenting Workshop is for you if you want to:

• Heal from inconsistent, controlling, or emotionally unavailable parents.

• Overcome self-doubt, fear, perfectionism, overthinking, low self-worth, and critical self-talk.

• Learn to manage difficult emotions like anger, shame, and people-pleasing tendencies.

• Develop healthy self-compassion and a strong sense of self-worth.

• Break free from emotional reactivity and build healthier coping mechanisms.

Sign up today for $99. And don’t forget, ming+ming members sign up for FREE!

You don’t want to miss this powerful healing opportunity, but if you do, don’t worry, we email you a recording.

We got you. You got you.

Ming-Wai + Ming-Cee

Mindful Reparenting Workshop
SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 8TH
noon - 3pm eastern | 9am - noon pacific
$75 before 8/31 ($99 after)
FREE for ming+ming members

SIGN UP NOW

Reparenting... and it's not just for parents

Can we tell you about Mindful Reparenting? 

It has nothing to do with if we had "good" parents or "bad" parents. We can all agree that our parents were doing the best they could (just like we are doing the best we can!) so let's put the blame aside for a moment.

We want to introduce you to our friend and reparenting expert, Bonnie. Next month, she will be leading you through guided meditations, interactive exercises, and teach you practical tools to build your understanding and compassion toward yourself.

If you are looking for deep healing to move past the feelings of blame, judgement, and animosity, you have to learn the skills to give YOURSELF the emotional support that you needed as a child.

That's why we are so excited to offer our next skill-building workshop: Mindful Reparenting!

In this one-day 3-hour workshop, you will be introduced to Mindful Reparenting skills that will allow you to give yourself the love, attention, and understanding you always deserved, but maybe didn't get as child. This online workshop is designed to help you understand and heal your younger self so you break free from the patterns holding you back from living your best life. 

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 8TH
noon - 3pm eastern | 9am - noon pacific
$75 before 8/31 ($99 after)
FREE for ming+ming members
SIGN UP NOW

We got you. You got you.
Ming-Wai + Ming-Cee

Hi, I'm Ming-Wai and I stopped talking for 5 days

The most common response I got when I told friends and co-workers that I was going on a 5-day silent meditation retreat was: Whoa, that’s intense.

And this surprised me because many of these people have hobbies that I find way more intense than meditating - like daily cold plunges, marathon running, or week-long backpacking trips in the wild.

But I acknowledge that meditation can feel intense sometimes. And my experience at this 5-day silent retreat was transformative because of it.

So what is a silent retreat? The meditation style of my retreat is called Vipassana and is held in “noble silence.” This not only means no talking, but also requires no reading, no journaling, and no eye contact. The meditation teacher does an evening talk about meditation principles to focus on, she will do guided meditations occasionally, and they offer some yoga classes. But other than that, the rest of our days were spent in seated or walking silent meditation.

My first 2 days felt strange but I really enjoyed not having to cook, clean, answer questions, make decisions, etc. It felt like vacation! The hardest part was walking by someone and not making eye contact. I also noticed that I missed that connection with people and missed small talk. I would want to ask where they got that sticker on their water bottle or where they got that sweater. But I’m a rule follower so I kept my eyes down and stayed in silence.

By the end of the third day, I was ready to binge watch some Netflix. I remember after dinner that night, I went to my bunk (yes, the room reminded me of a nicer version of my 5th grade sleep away camp) and grabbed my flashlight and thought how nice it would be to turn on my phone and chill the rest of the evening. 

But then I heard the gong that signaled our evening silent sitting meditation and shuffled back to the meditation room to keep hanging out with myself and my breath… again.

The view outside the meditation room

By the fourth day, I was starting to get really emotional. We did a guided meditation focusing on people that loved us unconditionally and tears were streaming down my cheeks as I visualized and felt the love that I am surrounded with in my life. I spent the rest of the day exploring these feelings, recognizing how blessed I am, embracing my worthiness to have such love, and noticing my negative reel when I questioned these truths.

On the morning of the fifth day, I woke up and thought how nice it would be to come home to my kids and husband and the tears welled up in my eyes again! During our walking meditation that morning, I hiked up to a little clearing and was looking over the valley. I was thinking about my purpose in life, where I wanted to put my energy, and all the people who support and love me… and there was about 10-15 seconds where I got a taste of how it felt to be truly embodied. In that short moment, I felt like I didn’t NEED anything. I recognized that I had everything that I needed and that I have the ability to choose how I wanted to invest my energy and move forward in alignment with my values and purpose. It was a feeling of intense freedom! And of course, I started crying again.

Within 10 minutes, I recognized how fleeting that feeling of freedom was. I was back in my head, feeling annoyed with something my sister said 2 weeks ago, trying to focus on my breath, wondering what would be served for dinner, and all the usual distractions of the mind.

And that was the transformative realization of my 5-day silent meditation experience. I cherish that taste of freedom that I got. But I also appreciate all the discomfort that I experienced during this retreat too. The discomfort of sharing a room, sleeping in a bunk bed, getting bug bites, not being able to complain about it, feeling all my emotions but not being able to talk or journal about it, and knowing that the only way forward is going within myself. The goal of this retreat (and of life) isn’t always to live in peace, tranquility, and attain enlightenment. No, the goal is to have the courage to experience it ALL and just be.

If you are interested in doing a silent meditation retreat, check out my review of Mindful Shenandoah Valley.

P.S. BIG NEWS! We're planning our first ming+ming retreat near San Luis Obispo at Sagrada Wellness in January 2025. Stay tuned!

put in the time or keep doing the crime

What do I want to change in my life?

This may be a simple question for some, but generally it’s very difficult to answer. We believe that most of us are terrified of change since deep down we know how difficult it is to get there. So instead, we just keep talking about how we wish things were different.

Talking about what we want to change is the easy part. But in order for real change to happen, we need to ask ourselves a much harder follow-up question:

Am I ready to put in the effort to make this change a reality?

This is where it gets uncomfortable - and understandably so! We must get to a point where the discomfort of change is worth more than suffering the status quo.
And that looks different for everyone depending on where we want to make that next change. What may seem like an easy decision in one aspect of our lives, could seem nearly impossible in another. Some may be willing to wake up early for a 5am workout, but may not be willing to give up their 5pm cocktails.

So taking the time to really unpack and discover what needs to change in our life is the only way to take the first steps towards healing our discomfort, pain and suffering.

And if you discover that you are not ready for change, then we suggest you don’t! If you're not willing to put in the time, then we suggest you continue doing the crime.

The female author George Eliot (it’s a pen name!) writes "It's never too late to be who you were meant to be." It’s okay if you’re not ready because that's part of the complexity of the healing journey. Give yourself grace to find the right time for you.

Generally, it’s the fear of the unknown that keeps us frozen. We won’t be able to move forward until we recognize and address that fear. Until then, we will be stuck in a cycle where our actions will be short-lived or half-assed without real dedication and lacking grit.

So when you are ready to put in the time, we are here to help you…

For most of us, our first step is just figuring out how to pause long enough and quiet things down to ask ourselves: “am I really ready to change?” If so, how do I get there? And If not, what is it that is keeping me stuck?

At ming+ming we offer that pause. We provide a quiet and supportive space to ask the hard questions and to answer them honestly. You can come to us and join our group classes or we can come to you for 1-on-1 coaching sessions. We are here to support you when you’re ready to invest in yourself so you can start enjoying this life you work so hard to create.